Digital Pessimism We hope to disappoint
A miniskirt recently released by Zara, showing vichy squares with side-scrolling, has become viral and has ended up causing a real fire in social networks.
The fire started in a Telefónica DSLAM that gives Internet access to the neighborhood of Seville where the influencer lives @ ladyaddict , spreading immediately by the nearby switches due to the still high temperatures of autumn and gusty winds. Alarms jumped when some websites in Seville began to show symptoms of burns and users’ computers expelled smoke upon accessing them.
Lady Addict wearing Zara. Source: Instagram.
The initial chaos caused that, by the time the fire station was alerted, the fire had already spread to the Facebook profiles of all Andalusia and was out of control.
“ We’re doing what we can, but it’s not easy ,” said Esteban Maquin, Captain of the Fire Department. “ We always say that websites should not have more than three levels of navigation, but continue to make them as high as possible “.
Despite the efforts, the flames arrived early this morning until Twitter , where there have been confirmed cases of burned user profiles in Madrid, Barcelona and Lisbon.
“ If the fire has been caused by routers that get too hot when processing images of it-girls in a miniskirt, the fire can re-erupt anywhere ,” Esteban Maquin. “ Now the priority is to control it so that it does not spread through transatlantic fibers and reaches America .”
Social networks like Instagram or Pinterest are already taking steps to avoid being affected. Among them, they have vetoed all Zara product photos and applied parental filters to any image where a woman’s legs are seen above her knees, replacing them with Donald Trump’s videos insulting Hillary Clinton in the last presidential debate.
Criticism of Zara
Although fashion victims and instagramers across the country are delighted with the repercussion, Zara’s marketing department has been criticized for designing skirts irresponsibly, as well as not collaborating to stop the fire.
“ Fashion brands and influencers always act the same, they just want to be able to break traffic records and millions of followers, some people just want to see the world burn,” he said. The Captain of the Fire Department.
Reactions
In the middle of the morning, Google algorithms have started to offer a black tag next to each result for a web that is burned. “ This is going to have a very important impact on SEO ,” commented on his twitter profile Barry Schwartz, Search Engine Rountable. “ With so many black tags on European websites, Google looks like a Halloween party right now.
Amazon has lowered the price of fire extinguishers and hoses 2 euros, in addition to optimizing its Shipping system until you can send orders with pigeons in less than 4 seconds to affected areas.
In Asian giant Alibaba , Jack Ma has said that the fires in Western social networks are none of his business and returned to his astral palace without saying more.
Finally, Iker Jiménez has made strange statements that a web page can burn, but it has been ignored by conspiranoico. In any case, prepare a special program on the subject in a few weeks, with Dr. Gaona, who will present a study analyzing the psyche of the pages.
